What I really meant to say
by SplendentGoddess
Summary: Just a short one-shot where Inuyasha reflects on how much of a baka he is. Once again, he's upset Kagome. It's not that hard to do.


Blanket Disclaimer:

Inuyasha, and the characters therein, are the property of Rumiko Takahashi. I am in no way affiliated with Takahashi, or VIZ Productions.

"Cold" is written by and is the property of Crossfade. I am in no way affiliated with Crossfade, Sony/ATV Songs LCC., or Sugarstar Publishing.

* * *

**What I really meant to say...**

Once again, the reining supreme baka sat upon his glorious throne in the branches of the Goshinboku, wallowing in his baka-ness while a certain pesky kitsune whelp wouldn't let him forget that it was _all his fault_.

"I'm sure Kagome-sama will be back in a couple of days…" Miroku tried to offer, but it didn't pacify the child.

"No she won't!" Shippou wailed. "She's gone! And it's all Inuyasha's fault!" he cried in the arms of the monk, feeling the hurt of losing his mother all over again.

Miroku sympathized with the child, but at the same time, could see the hurt that was quite apparent in his hanyou friend's eyes, as well.

"Inuyasha…perhaps you should-"

As was the case with most words of wisdom, they went unheard, or in that case, _unspoken,_ as the houshi was abruptly cut off.

"Perhaps you should shove it!" Inuyasha bellowed from his perch, attempting and failing to hide his regret as Shippou began to cry again. He hated tears.

"Very well, Inuyasha, I shall leave you to your brooding. Just remember …" the monk stated patiently. "We _all_ need Kagome-sama, but _you_ are the only one who can retrieve her. If you cannot bring yourself to apologize for your actions, at least consider that fact, my friend." And with that, he was gone, taking Shippou with him.

"Feh."

_Why should I apologize?_ he thought to himself.

_Because I'm a baka, that's why_…

_**Looking back at me I see that I never really got it right**_

_**I never stopped to think of you**_

_**I'm always wrapped up in things I cannot win**_

_**You are the antidote that gets me by**_

_**Something strong like a drug that gets me high**_

******FLASHBACK******

He had finally returned after having disappeared for over three hours. It had been innocent and all, though the look Kagome shot him didn't make him _feel_ innocent. All he and Kikyou had done was discuss rumors of Naraku's location…and…and he had reinstated that he'd protect her.

She had laughed. Kikyou had laughed in his face at his words. She was always hurting him like that since her resurrection, though he still couldn't just forget about her. He could _never_ forget about her. Already being a little on the irritable side, he wasn't in the mood for Kagome's interrogation, and when she asked him with no small amount of attitude where he'd been, he immediately snapped back with "None of your _fucking_ business!"

_**What I really meant to say**_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way I am**_

_**I never meant to be so cold**_

_**Never meant to be so cold**_

Kagome 'sat' him on the spot, tears swelling in her eyes. His response, of course, was "Fucking bitch!" which _really_ helped the situation, as Miroku and Sango looked on with saddened faces, and Shippou burst into tears, as he watched his adoptive mother turn tail and run straight for the well.

"Kagome…" Inuyasha sighed, as he pulled himself from the ground, the salt of her tears stinging his nose. _I didn't mean it!_ he screamed in his mind, but it was already too late to say it out loud, as the blue lights of time engulfed her.

_**What I really meant to say**_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way I am**_

_**I never meant to be so cold**_

_**Never meant to be so**_

_**Cold to you, I'm sorry about all the lies**_

_**Maybe in a different light**_

_**You can see me stand on my own again cause now I can see**_

_**You are the antidote that got me by**_

_**Something strong like a drug that got me high  
**_

******END FLASHBACK******

Having leapt down from the branches of the Goshinboku, Inuyasha quickly made his way over to the Bone Eater's Well, making sure that no one was watching. What would he say? What would _Kagome_ say? Damn it all! She promised she would always stay by his side! He couldn't just forget about his obligations to Kikyou…but yet…it was Kagome, he realized, that he couldn't live without.

_Kagome_….

_**What I really meant to say**_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way I am**_

_**I never meant to be so cold**_

_**Never meant to be so cold**_

Leaping silently into the well, the hanyou welcomed the feeling of traveling through time, as the magic he'd never understood, yet cherished, delivered him to Kagome's world.

_**What I really meant to say**_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way I am**_

_**I never meant to be so cold**_

_**Never meant to be so cold**_

_**I never meant to be so cold  
**_

As soon as Kagome had arrived on her side of time, she had run out of the well-house crying her eyes out. Not having wanted her family to see her so upset, she hadn't run up to her house, to her room, but instead, she had headed straight for the sacred tree. Sitting herself down on the bench that sat across from the tree of ages, the future-born-miko gazed upon it through blurry eyes, clearly seeing the tree as it appeared five hundred years in the past. It looked almost the same in her time…almost. Besides having a fence built around it, and a string of ofuda tide around its trunk, it had grown a little taller, and the spot where Inuyasha had been pinned was higher in her world, almost out of her reach. Many times she had touched that spot on the tree, always feeling a stronger connection to Inuyasha whenever she did so. Sluggishly rising to her feet, Kagome made her way to the tree in that moment, and standing on her tiptoes, she rubbed her hand up and down on the spot where he had once been sealed. Once, they'd even communicated through time using this tree. Why…why couldn't he just _talk_ with her, instead of being so cruel?

"Why do you have to be such a baka!" she cried out loud.

Slumping down to kneel on the ground at the base of the god tree, Kagome found herself wondering if perhaps she'd over reacted. After all, she should be used to his attitude problem by now. Maybe after she dried her tears, she'd return. She never could stay away for long, because any hurt he might have caused her would inevitably be replaced with the hurt she felt whenever she was separated from him. She just couldn't shake her desire to be with him, she could never stop…loving him. It was then that the miko suddenly felt his presence behind her, and looking up, she saw him standing there, the words he couldn't say reflected in his eyes.

_**I never really wanted you to see**_

_**The screwed up side of me that I keep**_

_**Locked inside of me so deep**_

_**It always seems to get to me...**_

_**I never really wanted you to go**_

_**So many things you should have known**_

_**I guess for me there's just no hope**_

_**I never meant to be so cold.**_

Silently, Inuyasha made his approach, as Kagome stood up, brushing the dirt from her legs.

"Let's go back." she said suddenly, taking his hand.

He tried to speak. Confusion, frustration, hurt, and…love, all reflected in his gaze as he met her eyes with his own.

"Kagome…" he managed to say aloud, in a soft, caring, and apologetic tone.

She heard in his voice what he couldn't say, and offered him a soft smile. Slowly, he smiled in return, cherishing the fact that she had forgiven him, yet again.

_**What I really meant to say**_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way I am**_

_**I never meant to be so cold**_

_**Never meant to be so cold**_

_**What I really meant to say**_

_**Is I'm sorry for the way I am**_

_**I never meant to be so cold**_

_**Never meant to be so cold**_


End file.
